Sunday, September 21, 2014

Overscheduled children

Children need to balance human doing with human being – Paula Bloom, clinical psychologist.

There is a lot of talk about the overscheduled child and if it is myth or legend.  Most experts agree that what families need to look for is the balance of after school activities along with family time.  Children need enough time without any activities, parents need enough time with no work and the two sides need time to come together to create activities of their own.
Spending time with your child with no goal in mind will communicate to your child that you love them. And if a child feels loved, life can present them with hardships, but setbacks will never defeat them.
Children benefit from having well-rounded experiences outside of academics.   This gives them the opportunity to hone skills and work together with other children.  If you’re wondering if your child is overscheduled, replay some mental pictures of them over the past week.  If all of your images are of them going from one activity to the next, doing homework, practicing an instrument – and there aren’t many moments of quiet and relaxation along with free play time then your child is too busy.  Look for signs of irritability or grumpiness, which may also show that your child’s schedule is out of whack.
When choosing after school activities, know where the motivation is coming from, you or your child.  If your child continues to be excited about the activity then you have found the right match for them.  One of the surest signs that a kid is overscheduled is when what used to be fun isn’t fun anymore.  Parents have to be in touch with their own feelings as well to ensure that they are not communicating that exemplary performance is the only goal that matters.  Children have to learn that the process of learning something new is as important as the end result.  The bottom line is that regardless of how many activities you schedule for your children, make sure you schedule time for yourself to be with them. 
Sources:

www.realsimple.com

http://www.cnn.com/2013/03/08/living/overscheduled-busy-children/


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